Julie Souza Bradley Lilly: The Burning Coals Project
But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
~Matthew 5:44 NIV
It was the hardest year of my life.
It was in 2013 that my husband, Jim, succumbed to cancer. I would love to tell you that after my husband died that countless people rallied around me, as a new widow, to help me in such a brutally hard time, but they didn’t. Apart from my parents and a couple of close friends I was on my own to navigate the choppy waters of grief.
I had always imagined widows being treated kindly, but instead, I was judged for not grieving correctly, told that I was taking too long to grieve and even falsely accused of things, that while utterly ridiculous, were still painful and insulting.
It’s been six years, and even though I am very happily remarried, I still have emotional wounds that bleed on occasion from that season in my life.
Recently, I found out that one of my greatest offenders is going through similar grief and loss. Out of the blue, the Lord plunked an offer into my heart—relating to a modification of the Golden Rule.
Based on Matthew 7:12, the Golden Rule says, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” What the Lord told me, is that relative to my grieving offender, that there is a secret to my receiving emotional healing. The Lord said:
“Do unto others as you would HAVE HAD them do unto you.”
“Do unto others as you would HAVE HAD them do unto you.”
~paraphrase of Matthew 7:12
Read that again. Part of my healing will come in ministering to the needs of my offender in the way that I needed but did not receive when I was hurting.
It is natural to bristle at the idea. They are reaping what they sowed. They are getting their just desserts.
Then the Lord reminded me that I was not left with the just desserts for my sins. Jesus came to spare me from Hell and damnation. Even though I have sinned against Him countless times, His love won out over revenge. He bore the penalty on Himself that rightfully belonged to His offender, namely ME.
Christianity is not for wimps. But I have zero question if this offer in my heart is from God or my imagination.
Forgiveness and responding to cruelty with love and kindness are part of taking up our cross to follow Him—dying to our flesh in order to honor Him and bless another.
I have already begun. By the time you read this, I will be ten weeks into my “Burning Coals Project.”
“If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you.” Proverbs 25:21-22 NIV
The coals are not heaped upon our enemy to burn them, but to bring a blessing of warmth to their home.
Beloved, if you have been wounded by unsafe people, I am not suggesting that you subject yourself again to harm or abuse. But I am suggesting that from afar, you pray forgiveness and blessing over your offender’s lives.
There is treasure buried here that few find. Jesus left it here, in this wounded place, for us to discover. Get out your shovel. Do the hard thing and dig through the heart of stone to find the heart of flesh (Ezekiel 36:26). Jesus set this example and was rewarded with the place of greatest honor, at the right hand of the Father. If we follow His example, we will be blessed, too.
How is one way you can show love to an enemy?
Father, strengthen me to do this wise thing that is so hard and painful. I cannot do it on my own. I need Your help to be able to deny my flesh, take up my cross and follow You (Matt 16:24-26)—not merely in my words, but in my deeds. Lord, make me into a true follower of Christ. Not my will, but Yours be done.
In Jesus’ name, amen.
Genre: Non-fiction
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